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HAPPY NEW YEAR
Arthur & Marilouise Kroker It’s New Year’s Eve at the ballroom of the Hilton Hotel in downtown Montreal. The usual for a nostalgia-flavored party staged by the local oldies’ radio station. It could be a high school reunion or a one-night cruise on the Good Ship Lollipop. Nothing new, everything old except, of course, we’re celebrating a New Year. Everyone is dressed for the occasion with lots of shimmer and shine. But one outfit really does stand out. It’s a woman wearing a sweater that spells out “Happy Holidays” in large battery-operated flashing neon letters. And it’s a big inspiration to us all, a kind of talisman taking us into the New Year. Fat guys begin to dance on tables, conga lines form and snake their way around the ballroom floor, empty champagne glasses are pyramided thirty high on tables filled with sparklers and red, blue and gold noisemakers, and the Pink Cadillacs get us to dance with their golden oldies’ tunes, from Danny and the Juniors’ At the Hop to Elvis’ Suspicious Minds and Jerry Lee Lewis’ Great Balls of Fire. Of course, no one mentions that Danny slit his throat one night in a motel room, and left a note saying that he just couldn’t stand singing that song one more time. We all know what happened to Elvis. And Jerry Lee Lewis? Well, there is all that talk about his dead wives. A frightening ritual of fake ecstasy and real nostalgia. HAPPY HOLIDAYS! |
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LAS VEGAS THEME PARK
Arthur & Marilouise Kroker Las Vegas is America at the 3d millennium A theme park of hope and desolation where prophets of the Old Testament Job most of all, sometimes give up the ghost, walk out of the desert and take their noon-day place at the blackjack tables Along the boulevard of broken dreams the dusty, windy gutters are filled with crumbling flyers for sex Las Vegas style Just outside of Caesar’s Palace gamblers on bended knees make offerings of incense and prayer at the shrine of the American Buddha under the desert sun Not Babylon revisited but a hybrid Babylon for a hybrid America showgirls and dying elephants and white tigers and Cirque de Soleil and hot air and cold air to the hyper and total surveillance and gamblers and hustlers and losers and winners and junior moms and dads with strap-on baby pouches come to the future come to the theme park come to pray one last time all day and all night at America’s last and best mall of magic and despair |
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SHOPPING FOR JESUS
Arthur & Marilouise Kroker it’s Easter Sunday in Montreal And I’m doing my very best for baby Jesus Dragging a pixel cross through the streets of the old city on a pilgrimage to the Oratory high on the hill. Yeah, the one with Brother Andre’s heart on grisly display. Rumor has it the heart went missing in ‘65 Stolen by the mob and held for ransom, But the Church just said: “Keep it. There’s plenty more where that came from.” And it’s a truly swell parade Seems that just everyone has come out for the big party of death and resurrection, Elvis look-alikes Cross-dressing Madonnas the restless, drifting soul of Kurt Cobain and I swear that just ahead of me Princess Di and Jackie 0 are all dressed up in their Easter Sunday finery A woman on stilts walks across the way carrying the head of John the Baptist on a plate to Planet Hollywood The tomb is empty Maybe it’s waiting for us And the cross is penance “Sure, and I’m a natural born virgin,” Madonna whispers in my ear. |
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SHOPPING THE GAP WTH NIETZSCHE
Arthur & Marilouise Kroker “I’ve got a game I like to play. I like to see how far I can get into the GAP before a salesclerk says: ‘Hi! How are ya’?” ’ Alexis Nietzsche wears khakis? You bet! A pre-GAP kind of guy who wrote On the Genealogy of Morals for an age when philosophy couldn’t be haikued into regular, slim or relaxed fit. When people hadn’t yet learned I how to recline . by shopping at the GAP circulating among all the black and beige and navy and white But then, the GAP is post-Nietzsche Because it’s about the post-human body like a hole, or a space in-between, where the body goes to disappear by fitting in, just vanishing into frenzied inertia: that’s styles in memory of events that never happened, or into a neutral-zone: the GAP is not the Abyss it’s a recombinant store where the basics can be folded, spliced, and resequenced And why? Because the GAP manufactures our fantasies "That shirt would be terrific for golf!” “These pants are nice for now, but great for Bermuda this winter!” “Everybody should have a flesh-colored bra in their wardrobe.” a nowhere style of clothes which are never really in, yet never really out no cuts, no transgressions, no disturbances, no gaps without Nietzsche digging in the soul-meat without conscience-vivisectioning for relaxed fit minds without body-vivisectioning for slim fit morality without nutcrackers of the soul for regular fit looks Where the post-human body in the mall happily disappears into The Genealogy of GAP. |
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SLASH AND BURN
Arthur & Marilouise Kroker We’re sitting in a cyber-coffee bar in San Francisco talking to Denise. A dancer by night and an artist by day, Denise is strikingly beautiful in a delicate, porcelain-like way: tall, slim with shoulder-length auburn hair, pierced nose, lip, and, of course, a single eyebrow. At one point she stood up, turned with her back towards us, displaying magnificent tattoos in the form of multi-color angel wings that went from her shoulderblades down to the small of her back in the colors of the most exquisite medieval stained-glass, and all this cut by slender red scars splayed up and down her arms. We ask about the scars and she tells us about the latest SM scene in the City. It seems these days that in the hip areas of San Francisco the body cybernetic is out-of-date, unplugged from outlaw consciousness and allowed to float off into the East where the tech-hype is only now getting underway. What’s really new in SF these days is some pain cut with a lot of healing. It’s called Slash and Burn. Cut long slits down your arms or legs, really any flesh will do, pour a bit of gasoline into the wounds, and then ignite the flesh. Now, don’t let it burn too long, we’re not talking about flesh arson here, about burning down the whole barn of the body in a massive end-ofthe- century conflagration, but about pain with a recuperative purpose. As Denise explains: the real joy of inflicting pain on your own body lies in the pleasure of the healing process. It’s almost addictive. Cut the flesh, pour on gas, watch it burn, and then eagerly anticipate the long, slow healing powers of the body. The body in San Francisco, then, as all about cynical feelings intensifying the pain of the flesh to get one last hit of the angel wings’of bodily healing. |
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THE CLAM KING
Arthur & Marilouise Kroker Just off Highway # 3 the old road, sometimes called the Nashua Turnpike, running between New Hamphire and Boston, Not Interstate 93 with its big six lanes of crash car traffic moving at hyper-velocity taking the dormer communities into the Boston office towers with their little speckled dreams of “Dress Down Fridays” but Highway No. 3 as what passes for a rural route in America these days, tired and hungry and speed-crazy you park your body in the Clam King. Been doing this for ten years, every six or seven months It’s across the street from a fantastic used-car Corvette dealership, right across the way from empty textile factories lining the Manchester River, and very best of all, just down the road from bargain-basement clothes at Marshalls and heart of the heart country books at the Caldor’s display: It was in Caldor’s one day that I first spotted Kenneth Anger’s Hollywood Babylon, the kind of book that is so good that you don’t want to buy it because anything this delicious must be out of bounds, not really serious just because it’s really serious. So, you leave Caldor’s without the book but every time you pass by that way again your car suddenly goes on auto-pilot and does a quick entry into the parking lot so that your brain sickness can be fed images of Dead Babylon And it gets to be a habit: Take Highway #3 to the Clam King order a heaping plate of fried clams (or little clamettes if you’re not too hungry), sit down with all the working clam-folks from the surrounding towns gaze out at the gleaming corvettes each with a story to tell about some mystery of the highway not yet explored, listen to the lonely sounds of the cars sliding on by, and read Hollywood Babylon again and again: James Dean: the “human ashtray” Jayne Mansfield: decapitated in a car accident Marilyn Monroe: suicided, Charlie Chaplin: Hollywood’s most famous chickenhawk Drug overdoses, hotel fires, murders of the stars by gun, by knife, by strangulation, by love All of the speed and violence and desire gone empty of crash America is in Hollywood Babylon, : a kind of raw primitive truth or maybe an illusion that’s willed into truth that you just know you want to feel this dark hole of energy in its last sacrificial rites to finally know America by its clam kings gone bust. |
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SHOPPING THE SECRET
VICTORIA’S SECRET Arthur & Marilouise Kroker Deep red velvet curtains with gold tassels, Roman striped wallpaper, low rose-colored lights, and a mirror that always lies. Red satin, pink lace, black lycra, Maidenform bras, thong bikini underwear, silk pajamas, a softly diffused smell of sachet. What is Victoria’s secret? Maybe it is the dressing-room, the mirror, the essence of sachet? Victoria’s Secret can be your secret Cellulite fades away in the dark Small breasts can be enhanced by the Wonderbra The stomach can be flattened by a lycra slip Midriff bulge can be masked by a long-line bra Or don’t think about your body’s flaws and slip into a diaphanous negligee Victoria’s Secret can be your secret with its dressing-room wonderful as a dense sign of the body imaginary Where you disappear into the mirror in the soft light becoming all sorts of people, playing back dreams of intimacy Victoria’s Secret can be your secret In front of the mirror you always look your best Posing head up high stomach in, back straight - dreaming ahead to a lover’s touch remembering a glance from a lover’s eyes Victoria’s Secret can be your secret This can all be your secret Until you exit the dressing-room into the mall with its fluorescent lights and the mood of your body deflates from Victoria’s Secret with its deep red velvet curtains with gold tassels, Roman striped wallpaper, low rose-colored lights and a mirror that always lies back into the body flawed that stands exposed to the mirror of life. |
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THE TRANSISTORIZED FACE: Give Me Your Code
Arthur & Marilouise Kroker For many years, doctors have been injecting silicone into women’s faces. Now a New York City doctor has outdone the procedure by taking silicone from low grade transistor fluids and injecting it directly into the skin of women, disappearing facial wrinkles. This is the new digitalized, transistorized face that rewires memory: no more wrinkles, no more tears, no more history. But the face does have a history, and a remembrance of that history. The transistorized face in New York rebels. It rejects the silicone, that tries desperately to justify its existence by sliding, seeping, weeping such that the transistorized face becomes a virtual face that floats beyond time, beyond wrinkles: it is also a face that operates under the sign of a fatal destiny. It will always oscillate between digital ecstasy and earthly decay. The scene of a greater mythological drama, the transistorized face remains condemned to an endless repetition of Nietzsche’s prophecy of eternal recurrence: a physics of the weightlessness and pure energy of wrinkle-free seduction versus the earthly drag of transistor fluid as it seeps under the fatal pull of gravity to the lower regions. |
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